Overdoing it and the Price of Obesity

My first blog last Sunday was so hopeful and positive!  I wrote about how I’ve had to learn to pace myself with physical activity. Apparently, I’m still learning the hard way—I really overdid it last Sunday and the viral bug I’d had a few days before blossomed into bronchitis. I felt so good last Sunday—I did an hour and a half of barn chores, an hour of riding lessons, and then mowed the front yard for exercise. Oh boy—I realized halfway through mowing I’d overdone it. I was sick on Monday and Tuesday, spending most of the day in bed. Today I went into work around noon and by five I was exhausted.

One bright spot in my day was putting on a blouse I hadn’t worn in a while—it was hanging off me. My husband noticed and commented how usually this shirt was a bit snug on me.  I’m 15 pounds down and have 50 more to go!  In six months I have a check-up with my diabetes counselor—I am very curious to see what my weight, my blood sugar levels, and cholesterol levels will be at that time. I really must keep going! Even just dropping the 15 pounds has made me feel better and lighter on my feet though I am still what is considered obese. I’ll get there.

I read an interesting article on the price of being overweight at    http://fitbie.msn.com/slideshow/price-being-overweight today. I wasn’t surprised that being overweight can be costly—it’s how expensive it can be and in what spending areas that surprised me.  According to George Washington University researchers, overweight women can spend up to an extra $4,879 a year because of their weight.  For myself alone, I’d be saving several hundred dollars a year if I didn’t have to take a special formulation of metformin for my pre-diabetes—that’s not counting the cholesterol medications and CPAP machine I’m on at the moment. All of this is due to my being overweight.

The article also discussed how overweight people pay more for gas, missed days at work, clothing, and life insurance.

I really hope no one will take this post as a tirade against overweight people. In my 20s and early 30s, I pitied and looked down upon overweight people. In my immaturity, I assumed people became overweight because they were lazy and undisciplined. Oh how the mighty have fallen! Now I know better! We become overweight for a variety of reasons—lack of time to exercise, desk jobs, motherhood, stress, unhappiness in key areas of our lives, metabolic changes as we age.

In my mid-40s I went on the South Beach Diet; I lost 50 lbs. and kept it off for three years. Then I had a devastating, highly emotional disappointment, which I will not relate here. Suffice it to say, this led me to start eating again. I regained twenty pounds in two months! On a gut feeling, I had a check-up and my doctor checked my blood sugar levels—I had become pre-diabetic. I have struggled ever since then to lose weight. I think that deep down I didn’t think I was worth taking care of. I believe many women, for various reasons, come to this subconscious conclusion—that their dreams aren’t worth tending to, that their lives have meaning only in the context of their husbands’ or children’s’ lives.

I recently was able to visit with a dear friend who two years ago left a marriage in which she was the one who had given up all her life dreams, in which she was the one who turned herself inside out to please her husband, and to try to hold her family together. She finally walked away—and while it’s been very difficult to climb out of her depression and grief, she did it. She recently found a career in which she can use her unique skills. She’s lost weight, cut her hair, and looks very stylish and attractive. She looks younger than she did when she was in her marriage. She too, is in her 50s like I am, but she looks to be in her forties now!

Another friend once said to me that middle age had gone like this for her: “the figure-it-out forties and the f_ck it fifties.” I finally understand what she means now.  With whatever time I have left on earth, I need to be living it in the way that brings me the most joy and fulfillment and allows me to make  whatever contribution I can to the lives of those around me. To have my health back will allow me to do that in the fullest way.

Here’s to all of us, ladies!